i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
