well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize