Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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