If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Teenager with grandparents staying in their room: is to blue balls, as parent waiting for teen to come home safe: is to sleep. You will live- love mom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Was looking through my phone and saw that drunk me took a tit pic in the Denny's bathroom..
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
In other news, I just sneezed and almost shit myself. What is happening to my life??
I have post one night stand depression
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