Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
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