why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Can we just focus for a minute on the fact that I HAD MY FIRST LESBIAN ENCOUNTER.
Right. How rude of me to inform you that you're going to be an aunt.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
