i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
Randomize
