i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
