Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
Randomize
