Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
it was like fucking gandolphs beard
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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