haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
i tried to light my apt on fire. reasons why drunks and women should not cook
her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
If you hook up with a kid and the next day he breaks up with his girlfriend, those can be seen as two completely unrelated incidents right?!
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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