I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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