You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i'm not going because i feel like it's just gunna be a "this is your life" who i banged this years addition
I feel like royalty, that girl from last night had a vajazzled vag. Bucket list complete.
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
The liquor store wont accept checks from us anymore.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
What part of a retired stonemason dealing with your rock hard cock does not sound like you have the wrong number ?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
