My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
Taking shots of gin by myself out of TMNT glasses and chasing with bites of chocolate cake. AMERICA.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
Randomize
