Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
