is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
somehow, even strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA can't understand why he'd choose her over me
maybe it's because you talk to strange, drunk, middle-aged men on the RTA
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
