the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
Baffled as to how I'm gonna get 150lbs of sand out of my basement.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I feel like I'm a marionette being lifted around. Four Loko.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
You need to let him know my only agenda is coke and sadness.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I went through my entire iTunes library and made a playlist called "Feelings". I have 7.5 hours of feelings.
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
Randomize
