drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
He made me choke him and call him Papi..so all in all a good night.
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
