so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
She showed me her prom dress from 2001, which still had her date's cum stain on it.
Oh, so that's why you call her jizzarella....
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
