How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
she looked like the bat from fern gully.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
He better not be in your backpack
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
