so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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