I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
At the start of the night I was all 'come at me universe' and three hours later I was ordering an extra large pizza in bed in the dress I had gone out in. Well played universe.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I got caught throwing up in my daughters princess potty... On the bright side it played a rewarding tune afterwards.
Randomize
