i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
So you walked 4 miles to get home but stopped by the store first to get a vegetable tray? How drunk were you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
I think I puked in the middle of sex last night if that's any indication as to how drunk I was.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize