FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize