I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
We get drunk and make out in different places. Is that what love is?
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
dude new orleans is fucking wild these two guys just performed dueling banjos except they were actually fighting with the banjos
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
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