You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
