Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I woke up to him eating me out, listening to classical music.
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
Sorry, I didn't know he was with you. The ongoing collapse of Trump has me horny as hell.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
Randomize
