I just walked into the kitchen and my dad was having this uber serious convo
With himself
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
I just made my mom buy me lube. I've reached a new level of broke.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
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