Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Sorry my hands just texted you
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
