well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
