Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
love makes seman taste better
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
Man, jail baloney is awful.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
And now you know why we call him Three-Balls Brad
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
Randomize