Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
a search helicopter?!
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I just matched with a taco on tinder. Dreams come true.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Randomize
