now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
let's get her a shirt that says "i went to key west for spring break and all i got was this illegitimate child."
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
Finally considering to keep my landing strip before I have sex.. I feel like It makes me look mature.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
I'm hungover as hell. I'm dying. I have no skin left on my knees
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
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