If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
I might need to come puke in your toliet on the way home
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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