My mom just told me that after i turned eight i stopped growing mentally and emotionally
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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