I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
