I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
whenever i get involved w someone i'm gonna give you their number to testify to the fact that they should not fall in love with me
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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