Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize