I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
we found his I.D. in the upstairs bathroom...under a towel in a hidden pile of snacks from her kitchen
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize