You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I lost control in the snow and hit a parked car. I went into our building to get a pen and paper to leave a note and when I came back the car was gone and there was a hot girl there. I used the pen and paper to get her number.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
The other guys kept waking up so I hid... Like, dick in mouth, hiding in his sleeping bag
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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