I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Boobs are out for the taking
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize