Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Its really bad when you fall asleep at a stop light outside the hotel and you wake up to a small spanish limo driver knocking on your window to tell you it's a green light
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I told him I was gunna have sex with him in both of our cars at the same time.
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
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