the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I smell like cowboy sweat. I got two lap dances. This is the best day of my life!
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Randomize
