I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
why didn't you poke me back
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
I can't come. It's so cold my uterine walls have frozen together like a cherry popsicle.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Randomize
