You really coming over, don't trick.
I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
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