Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any parent would be proud to have a daughter that's a blowjob fairy
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
On a Thurs night I found myself drunk in a limo w 9 dudes on my way to a strip club. Once there I was handed $100 in ones and told "spend it." I need a husband. Or Jesus.
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
It's been so long since I had sex I might propose to the next girl who will sleep with me.
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