he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
What should I wear?
Uhhhhh...idk? it's a gay bar
I found something that says "i'm here to party, but not fuck guys."
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
Also, your vagina needs a time out and let your brain have a chance to make decisions.
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
Randomize
