Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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