using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Friend I haven't seen in almost a year just IMed me to let me know that my mom stuck her boob out the window on the freeway at her.
Her mom responded by mooning my mother. I really don't know what's worse.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
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The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
You know how there are wrinkles in your brain? What if they were filled with potato chips? That's kind of how my head feels now.
in the middle of getting head my cat meowed. she looked up , meowed back, and then continued giving me head.
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Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
We are planning a drunk snapchat treasure hunt for tomorrow, and the treasure is his penis, this is a game I'm not willing to loose.
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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