oh god the rape fog is back!
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
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