And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
DUDE EDDIE MURPHY JUST DID A BODY SHOT OFF A HOOKER. IM NEVER COMING HOME
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Randomize
